


Teardrops upon a Photograph

by Lady_GothiKa



Series: Sweet & Sour - Victor Zsasz [8]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Death, Grief/Mourning, Oswald trying to get over the death of his mother, Talk of Suicide, Victor Zsasz's talking about his backstory, Victor being surprisingly helpful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 04:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21191369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_GothiKa/pseuds/Lady_GothiKa
Summary: Even after a year, Oswald can’t move on - his mother was the only person who truly loved him.Victor doesn’t know what to say, so he starts with the truth.“I know how you feel, boss.”“I’ve lost my mother too.”





	Teardrops upon a Photograph

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for the mentioned Tags.
> 
> Also Victor talking about his canon backstory.... which is surprisingly tragic.

Oswald had been crying for at least an hour, maybe more.

The assassin could hear the faint sobs through the door as he paced the hall. Hesitantly, he rolled back his sleeve as he had done for the last thirty minutes. Ed was well past fashionably late, which even Victor Zsasz had to admit was seriously unclassy to the highest of standards.

He couldn’t believe this. Had it really come to this? It was the anniversary of his mother’s death no less and Edward was off gallivanting around with a woman he met and fallen in love within the span of a freaking week. Victor rubbed the back of his neck, he couldn’t listen to this any longer. There was something about hearing Oswald breaking down like this that was doing him in.

Half an hour later he knocks at his boss’ bedroom door, he feels uncomfortable and out of place, nevertheless he persists with his plan. Oswald yells as he suspected, his voice breaks through his own agony. “Leave me alone!” He proceeds to say, even though Victor knows full well, he does not. Oswald is strong but even he has a breaking point, even _ he _ does not wish to be alone.

_ “Boss…” _

Oswald was in worse shape than he had expected, he was curled up in the fetal position in bed and hugging his pillow to muffle his own tears. Shit, Victor had cursed under his breath.

“Victor, I told you to go away! _Go home!” _

Zsasz ignored that order, “Y’know, I get how you feel….” 

Oswald didn’t move, nor did he say anything of significant substance. The man was an absolute wreck. 

_ “I lost my mother too.” _

Cobblepot finally looks towards his hired gun, “You…. _ did?” _He didn’t know, Falcone was one of the few people who actually knew, Zsasz had never been the sort to talk about these things.

“Yeah,” He steps forward, a hand locked out of site “A while back. Lost my father too… the same day actually…” Victor still remembers it like it was yesterday, the path to his own self-destruction wasn’t an easy thing to forget. “It was a pretty crap day.”

His boss glances down and way, his eyes looking at the photograph of his mother from his bedside table, he holds onto it like it’s the only thing he has left of value. “I am sorry for your loss, Victor. I didn’t know…” Oswald whispers, “I miss mother dearly… How am I…” his expression cracks a little more, “—supposed to move on?” 

It was a harsh truth, but Oswald needed to hear it. “You won’t. Grief changes who you are - A part of you will never be the same. A part of you will never be as whole as you once were…” The assassin tells him as soft as he could, acknowledging this from his own personal experience, “if you’re lucky, you’ll grow numb over time and not feel anything at all.”

A tear drops onto his mother’s photograph.

“So I am expected to remain -what... detached forever?” He’s boss wipes his eyes with a handkerchief.

Victor sighed, “I can’t speak for you, but it’s what I do — it seems like the most sensible thing to do for a person in my situation.” He breathes and tells the truth, “Contrary to popular belief, I haven’t always been like this you know boss… I once was a fairly regular guy, occasionally I wonder what I would be doing if things had been different. I am pretty sure I have always been pretty perverse and sadistic though… So a dentist, maybe?”

Oswald’s frown splintered into a glimpse of a smile, looking him in the eye. He looks so worn and torn, battered and defeated. Ed would have been so much better at this — though he wasn’t, and Victor had no alternative but to fill in the rather large gap he had left open. 

“I apologize for letting you see me like this,” Oswald tells him, “I must look rather pathetic from an outside view.”

Zsasz rolled his eyes, he didn’t need to apologize - not to him, nor anyone. “Not at all boss, I would say you were doing well. You’re handing this a lot better than I ever did, that’s for sure.” 

Oswald perked a brow. 

Victor exhales a large breath of air. Somehow, his voice remains oddly optimistic the whole time he’s talking, “I tried to jump off a bridge.” 

“What?!”

Zsasz shrugs, “Told ya, didn't I?” His lopsided grin almost looked goofy, “I am afraid I was terribly dramatic as a younger man, though it seemed like the easiest choice at the time - I don’t really know, I was intoxicated and reckless. I made many slips of judgment along the way to be where I am today… I am a man who needs a purpose, or so Falcone liked to tell me.” 

“What stopped you, if you don’t mind me asking…” Now it was Oswald’s time to feel awkward, apparently… but alas, if it took his mind away from the grief for even a moment, Zsasz considered it an accomplishment.

Victor gave him a look and battered his dark, lashless eyes, “I was interrupted.” 

_ “Falcone?” _

“No,” He corrects, “A mugger.” Zsasz takes Oswald’s silence as a reason to go on, “I know right? It was fucking impolite.”

“That’s one way of interpreting it.” 

“There I was trying to have a heartfelt moment, then some asshole comes along with a knife and ruins everything— that was my first kill.”  


The room feels oddly silent until Victor breathes. “Anyway boss, enough about me. We shouldn’t be leaving your mother waiting… it’s an important day after all…”

“What are you talking about Zsasz?”

His hand shifts from behind his back to reveal what he had hidden from plain sight. 

It was a bouquet. 

_Lilies, his mother's favorite._

“You remembered?” Oswald was almost left without words, he takes them to cherish their aromatic scent, which held so many fond memories.   


The truth was, Victor remembered a lot of things. “I would never forget.” 

“Thank you, Zsasz….”

“So are we going to take them to her?” He meant to her grave, but… Oswald knew what he was proposing.

“I would like that.” his boss nods and Victor encourages him out of bed, his arm supporting his weight.

“Maybe we could even get Ice cream on the way back, huh?!”

“Don’t push your luck, Zsasz.” 

Hey, it was worth a shot.


End file.
